#they both need a good solid bonk on the head tbh u_u

[awynter]

Her mind felt beyond fuzzy, it felt blank, empty. No thoughts occupying the inside of her brain other than him.

Don't be sorry. At this, Anne lets out a humorless laugh. Don't be sorry? How could she not be sorry when she'd taken advantage of the situation for her own benefit? It didn't matter if he had kissed her first. It didn't matter how much she'd wanted him to, it was wrong. At his whispered confession, Anne looked up at him with wide, watery eyes.

"What...? But I thought... And you... You and Sarah..." She couldn't seem to form a single coherent thought, the sentences floating just out of reach. He had been here to see Sarah, to call upon Sarah. But he was kissing Anne. And as guilty as she knew she ought to be, all she felt was relief and joy. And utter confliction.

But I do. It takes her a moment to realize what he was saying. He did like her. He didn't hate her for the cruel things she'd said, for the inconveniences and burdens she'd placed upon him nonstop since they'd first met. Mercifully, he liked her. And she liked him, too. So, so much. Emotion bubbled in her chest at his words and she let out a laugh, a single tear spilling down her cheek.

"Did you not pay attention to the play at all?" She quelled another laugh as she stepped closer, dropping her voice even lower. "The Fairy Princess was in love with the Frog Prince, you fool. Is in love with the Frog Prince." It was as close as she dared to confessing her entire feelings in this moment. She didn't know what love was supposed to feel like, and yet that's the only word she can think to describe the gnawing ache in her chest every time she saw him.

He pulled away and it was as though the illusion broke. They couldn't stay out here forever. Sarah would be wondering where they'd gone and the last thing Anne needed was for anyone to walk in on them like this. Their clothes were on and their hands were no longer hungrily searching each other anymore, but the flush in her cheeks and the guilty look on Ben's face would say more than any words could.

"We can't." She repeated, nodding as though trying to convince herself of the sentiment. "It's not right. Especially not if Sarah..." Anne shot a look over her shoulder, towards the direction of the drawing room. Sarah hadn't dared peek out into the hallway yet, but it was onyl a matter of time until she got impatient. But Anne knew she couldn't let this flame die here.

"We will speak of this later. For now..." Idly she raised her hand to her mouth again, biting her lip to quell the nervous swell of panic that was stirring in her gut. She was in trouble. But not in as much trouble as she would be if someone caught them. "W-We go back in there a-and pretend nothing happened, okay? We pretend that this," She gestured between them as she began to formulate the plan out loud, not caring if it sounded ridiculous or improbable. "Did not happen. A-As for you..."

As much as she was trying to think logically, to come up with a proper solution to the problem at hand, her mind kept wandering to his wordsw. Maybe I want to love.

"You," She started again, holding a trembling finger in his direction, trying her best to remain upright and not wither beneath the unbearable weight of her heart. "Need to decide what you want. Who you want. Because if you truly wish to pursue Lady Sarah, tell me now so that I may distance myself from the both of you. I cannot, I will not, allow myself to fall for another man who's heart belongs to someone else, Ben. Not again. S-So, if this was just a man thing to fulfill some need, that holds no merit in your heart, I pray that you are man enough to tell me so that I do not get my hopes up for a fleeting moment of passion. My heart could not bear it..."

As the last words of her rant trail off, she loses the war in her chest and tears spill forth, soaking her cheeks. Anne swiped at her face, making a futile attempt to pretend she was calm and collected even though it was clear she was anything but. Her nose reddened and she sniffled as she tried to catch her breath. After a moment, she let out a dejected sigh and met his gaze, lips wobbling.

"The washroom is down the hall, the last door on the left."

Anne was speaking to him, yet Benjamin couldn't think, couldn't focus. With his breath in his lungs like knifepoints, he dragged a hand through his hair and swallowed. "No," he said again, shaking his head. "No, no, I didn't mean..." But you did. "I-I never meant..."

Anne cut him off with a firm tug against his cravat, and then her mouth was suddenly latching onto his, fierce and enthusiastic as he staggered with her against the wall. His teeth sank into her bottom lip and he licked at the affliction, angling in with a needy savagery as her hands fell to his hair, his shoulders, his face.

“Please… Don't…���

Anne's whispered plea needled through him, guilted him, but just as Benjamin tried to pull away, Anne deepened the kiss and whimpered into his open mouth. Her soft sounds inflamed him, and fighting back a moan, he greedily met her tongue with his and rolled his hips against her trembling frame, the taste of her making him throb as he imagined what it would be like to hold her -- what it would be like for her to wrap her legs around him while he drove into her welcoming body.

Yet again, Anne broke the kiss, her apology plaintive and snagging across his heartstrings.

Breathing hard, Benjamin peered back at her through low-lashed, lust-blown eyes and swallowed. "Don't be," he pleaded. "Don't be sorry..."

Moving in to steal another kiss, he only halted at Anne's earnest reminder. "B-But Sarah..."

Benjamin flinched, genuine remorse tearing across his features.

"You... You like Sarah...?"

He miserably shook his head, cupping the side of her face. "No," he whispered, "I do not -- or at least, not in the way she deserves."

A despairing tension formed in Anne's frame. "You don't like me," she persisted. "Y-You can't like me."

"But I do," he argued. "Miss Wynter, I'm fully aware that I'm a 'frog prince' who should keep to his side of the pond, but you have shown me kindness -- you have shown me great strength and intellect and humor, and by God, maybe I just want to feel the part of me I never thought I'd feel again... Maybe I want to love, and not burrow away from my fate." Mouth dry, he released her as if she'd burned him, his chin wobbling as he exhaled. "But you're right...we shouldn't. We can't."

Not like this.